For the wedding in Israel, those of us who were stuck in the US had nothing to do but wait to watch it all unfold on Facebook. This time around, the folks in Israel and the ones who are unable to travel due to the coronavirus (ALAS) are the ones who just have to wait to see the celebration online. It is a very strange experience, especially for the parents, I think. Yael's mother and I are regular penpals now because of this unusual set of circumstances -- and that has been an unexpected pleasure. We have never met in real life, but we are getting to know each other, bit by bit.
This wedding is not causing much stress. We plan to get really serious tomorrow, which gives us a full 24 hours to do the work of preparing the site. We will clean up the Moutoux Barn and get all the tables and chairs in one place and find out if we actually have enough forks. The weather (which has been absolutely picture perfect for over a month) is on track to deteriorate rapidly by Sunday, with the remnants of Hurricane Delta coming through right about when the wedding is supposed to start.
It's not as if nothing has been done yet. Rebecca and Alissa have all the pieces of the wedding cake in the freezer. They have stayed on schedule with all the steps that they planned out, and the process has been calm and without drama. They are both experienced bakers and they decided to make three different cakes into a not very big masterpiece, so it won't be one of those seventy pound tiered structures. And they won't be weeping in the walk-in cooler as they try to keep the icing from melting because it is going to be perfectly chilly on Sunday.
The bride and groom have done their part, getting an official marriage license, meeting with the rabbi on Zoom, taking their wedding finery to the dry cleaner and getting the ketubah printed. They are also coming up with appropriate activities for a covid-era wedding. Since we can't sing and dance and schmooze in close quarters, we will be doing crafts (now there is a plan for wedding quilt squares to be assembled at the event, which will be stitched together later by Yael) and sharing performances at a safe distance.
Jon has been making sample appetizers and main courses for the last week or so -- all of us in this house know what each dish will taste like. He will undoubtedly be challenged by the lack of a stove and sink in the barn, but this is not his first rodeo. And the group is so small that it is much like cooking a fancy common meal. I think he has done all the shopping but he has not started to cook yet and he doesn't seem too worried. When I came home from Loudoun last night and reported that all the plumbing in the Green Barn is clogged up, he said he has time to go out there this morning and work on that. So, based on that, it seems like he feels pretty good about his level of preparation.
We have not had any sort of briefing on our various roles, but we have a lot of collective experience with this wedding business, and we will pull it together. Apparently the rabbi is a bit unsettled about a few things that haven't really been discussed, but they are minor and will all become clear (we don't even know yet where the chuppah will be since we have to wait to see how hard it is raining and whether the assembled guests can actually sit outside under market tarps and be able to hear anything).
It will be memorable. Benjamin is worried that it won't feel enough like a celebration, with everyone in masks and forbidden to be close to each other. The masks will definitely be a drag. But it can't help being a joyful celebration, just by definition. The invited guests have assembled many, many times in our lifetimes and that alone is a source of joy.
It is very sad that the parents of the bride and groom have never met in person. But someday we will, and this is not the first time in history that this has happened. I am not sure that my mother's parents ever met my father's parents, come to think of it. My parents got married without the blessing of my Chinese grandparents -- and apparently all was forgiven only after I was born. Benjamin and Yael have the blessing of all four of their parents, and I am certain that we will meet Hedy and Gadi in person in the near future.
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